How to Challenge Beliefs

We tend to start questioning our beliefs when we tire of stagnating in comfort, or when we see that the answers we’ve been given don’t add up, or when we just feel like there is something more that we’re not seeing in our life experience. Every person will do this in their own way when they are ready, but here are a few methods I’ve found helpful in opening my mind to new possibilities:

• Read or listen to opposing views. But not from the perspective of how to prove them wrong or fit them into your current framework of reality. Instead, see them without any judgment. Identify their value and maybe even try them on for size to see what the world looks like through that lens. This can be terrifying, difficult, and very uncomfortable. It is common to take a glimpse into an opposing view, not know how to deal with the questions or emotions it brings up (especially when existing beliefs creep in), and give up before fully exploring the view. Instead, welcome the discomfort. Stay with the belief for a while. Yes, it may completely change your view of reality, and that can be scary. But if you give up too early because of fear or discomfort, then you’re selling yourself short of reaching deeper levels of understanding and truth.
• Gain perspective. Spend some time with people who have completely different worldviews than you. Travel to foreign countries where the language, religion, and culture is different. Talk to the impoverished and the wealthy, the activists and the pacifists, the traditional and the unique. Try to see the world how they do, and see what it teaches you. Notice how some of your beliefs are not part of their framework at all, and how that affects them or not.
• Study the mind. Learn about how our beliefs are formed and how we tend to hold onto false beliefs, even when it doesn’t make sense. Read a book like Don’t Believe Everything You Think or some of these thought-provoking books.
• Identify hidden beliefs. When we make a statement or ask a question, there is often a hidden limiting belief lying beneath our words. These can be tricky to identify, but they permeate how we talk and think, and can limit our view. Here are some examples of possible hidden beliefs in statements and questions. “Why did God let my son die?” (Possible hidden beliefs: Your son died. God is responsible for that. God cares about your son. God exists.”) “I wish I had more money.” (Possible hidden beliefs: More money will make you happy. It is too difficult to get more money. Rich people are greedy and are the reason I have so little.”)
• Watch your emotions. If you find yourself feeling angry or defensive when an idea is presented to you, or when one of your beliefs is challenged, this can be an indicator of a belief you may identifying with or holding onto for comfort. Whether you decide to question these beliefs or not, being aware of the beliefs you’re most attached to can help you see what’s driving your behavior and allow you to question them when you’re ready.

These methods are rarely comfortable. But in order for growth to happen, in order for us to know the truth, and in order to increase our freedom, we must be willing to get out of our comfort zone and sincerely question our beliefs.

I recently watched a moving and funny documentary called Kumaré about a man from New Jersey who pretended to be an Indian guru, went to Arizona, and gained a following of real people. He taught them fake yoga moves and made up chants. Yet, some of his followers were profoundly touched by these practices, and went on to make positive changes in their lives. They found comfort in these empty rituals and made up teachings. He also taught that they didn’t need a guru and could become their ideal selves on their own, a lesson he was experimenting with as he taught it.

The most interesting part for me was seeing the internal struggle this man had with revealing his true self to his followers, and how they reacted to the news. I won’t spoil it for you, but the choice between comfort and truth is apparent here as well. You can watch the movie at http://kumaremovie.com.

While comfort can be nice, I invite you to ask yourself if you have a belief that it might be time to question. Is there something you’ve been believing that doesn’t resonate with you anymore? Is there a hidden assumption that’s holding you back from reaching your potential? Is there something you have doubts about but are afraid to look at completely?

If so, I invite you to jump into the fire, embrace the discomfort, and see what lies on the other side for you. I can’t make any promises about what you will experience, but every time I have done this, an unexpected new world of deeper understanding has opened up to me and changed my life in profound and positive ways. It can be like waking up from a dream or hatching out of an egg.

If you have the desire, I hope you will take the chance to break through the barriers of your limiting beliefs when you feel ready to do so; and that the world you discover beyond them will bring more comfort and truth than you’ve ever known.

About the Author

Brandon Pearce is an entrepreneur, world traveller and blogger. Please follow him on his journey with his family at PearceOnEarth.com.

The Synchronicity and Meditation Connection

November 15, 2013 | By WakingTimes | 2 Replies

Dr. Robert Puff, Ph.D., Meditation for Health
Waking Times

You’re talking to a friend and there’s a pause in the conversation. You break the silence by saying what just popped in your mind. Your friend responds with, “No way! I was thinking the exact same thing.”

You stumble upon a friend’s number in your address book; you decide to give her a ring to see how she is. She picks up the phone and shares that her grandmother just died, and she really needed your support. You reached out to her at the precise moment that she was seeking comfort.

Events like these have a small probability of occurring, yet they still happen. Some would call them coincidences. But I encourage you to think differently. The focus of this post is on the phenomenon called synchronicity.

The Subjective Truth of Synchronicity

Synchronicity is related to probability. Because synchronous events usually take place between two people, and they are rare and unplanned, scientific study of them is few and far between. But that doesn’t mean that they are outside our experiences. We find proof of synchronicity in our lives and by listening to the experiences of others. In fact, sharing our synchronous experiences are a powerful way to reinforce their validity

The chance of something out-of-the-ordinary taking place between two people is miniscule, yet it happens. When you experience it, it’s very real and meaningful, but because it’s so personal, other people can’t necessarily prove it.

I’d like to share a story that illustrates my point. Years ago, I was working with a client who was very, very busy. I encouraged her to slow down and take time for herself. “If you don’t, there could be serious consequences from your behavior,” I recall telling her. I didn’t say it to frighten her. Rather, I sought to help her avoid possible suffering.

Shortly after our conversation, she was driving on the freeway. And as always, her car was going way past the speed limit. Suddenly, a truck in front of her spun out of control. As the massive vehicle came within inches of killing her, the words “Slow Down” were written on the side of the truck. To my client, it was an undeniable message telling her that if she didn’t re-evaluate the frenetic pace of her life, she’d experience negative consequences.

Later she joked that I had magically made the words “Slow Down” appear. Of course, I didn’t have anything to do with it; it was just another remarkable event that could be discounted as mere coincidence.
The Synchronicity and Meditation Connection

Perhaps you too have had a time where—to use the language of religion and spirituality—the Universe, or God, or whatever name you use, seemed to send you a message so loudly and clearly that it grabbed your attention. So what does this have to do with meditation?

The goal of meditation is to slow you down, quiet your mind, and maintain stillness. As you do this, you may find that synchronous events increase.

Because meditation is such a powerful force for change, and helpful in countless ways, I wonder if God perhaps gives back to us. Synchronous events let us know that we are on the right track and encourage us to continue meditating. In my experience, they happen with greater frequency the more I meditate.

There’s only one person who can validate or disqualify the claim that synchronicity increases the more you meditate. That person is you. One way to measure this is by keeping a notebook where you record so-called coincidences or out-of-the-ordinary moments. As you commit to meditation, see if these don’t happen more often.

I encourage that you write synchronous experiences down because once they take place, we tend to forget them. We may notice them, but we don’t become attached to them once they occur, which is typically a good thing. In this case, however, I believe that by recording synchronous events, you’ll notice that they increase as your meditative practice deepens. You may recognize that synchronicity is another benefit of meditationand yet another example of meditation’s transformative power.

Suspend judgment for a while and just give it a try. Meditate regularly, once in the morning and once in the evening, and see if life flows better. Witness if synchronous events happen with greater frequency. And feel free to share your stories with me.

7 Things They Should Teach You in School but Don’t

November 17, 2013 | By WakingTimes | Reply

Luminita D. Saviuc, GuestWaking Times

“It is hard to convince a high school student that he will encounter a lot of problems more difficult than those of algebra and geometry.” ~ Edgar W. Howe

You know what I realized recently? That I don’t really remember much of the things I have learned in school. I don’t know about you, but when I think about the things that shaped and helped me improve myself and my life, the things that contributed to my growth and evolution, I realize that they didn’t came from school but from what I have learned after I finished my studies… I guess Dr. Seuss was right, “You can get help from teachers, but you are going to have to learn a lot by yourself, sitting alone in a room.”

What I will share with you today is a list of 7 things I think should teach you in school but don’t. Enjoy.

1. The more positive your thoughts are, the happier your life gets

Most of us have no idea how powerful our thoughts are and how, because of our polluted and toxic way of thinking, we make our lives a lot harder and unhappier than it should be. Just look how beautifully Albert Einstein talks about the power of our thoughts:

“The world as we have created it is a process of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.”

Our thoughts shape and make us who we are. If our thoughts are negative and destructive, our beliefs will mirror our thoughts and based on these beliefs we will craft our lives. If the mind is made pure, everything else will be made pure.

“If you can change your mind, you can change your life.” ~ William James

I wish they would’ve taught me these things in school. I wish they would’ve told me that once you change your thinking you are in fact changing your whole life and that the more positive your thoughts are, the happier your life will get.

2. People will raise and lower at the level of your expectations

When I was a little kid, I didn’t like my teachers very much simply because I felt like they were treating their students differently based on the way we all looked, the way we were dressed and based on who our parents were.

They were placing labels on little kids, treating all of us differently, condemning those who came from less favorable homes to stay stuck in that place while those who came from more fortunate backgrounds to become better and better at everything they did.

The way I see it, a teachers’s job and responsibility is to shape his or her students in a beautiful and powerful way, to raise them up and not to tear them.

One of my favorite quotes of all times comes from Goethe where he talks about how people will raise and lower at the level of your expectations:

“If you treat an individual as he is, he will remain how he is. But if you treat him as if he were what he ought to be and could be, he will become what he ought to be and could be.”

3. The value of Self Love

If you ask me, self love is the key to a happy and meaningful life. When you honor and love yourself for who you are and for who you are not, you will know how to honor and love the world around you as well.

Because you have so much love for yourself, you will extend that love outwards, on to your family and friends, your work, the environment and every living thing you come in contact with.

We project outwards that which we are inwards and if we learn to love and accept ourselves we will know how to love and accept the whole world.

“The most powerful relationship you will ever have is the relationship with yourself.” ~ Steve Maraboli,

4. A musician must make music, an artist must paint and a poet must write

I studied art for 12 years but because I was lead to believe that you can’t really make a living from pursuing a career in this field, I was “advised” to go study Economics, because you see, that’s where the money is.

As the “well behaved human” that I was at that time and because I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, I did what the “experts” suggested I would do. I went to University and studied Economics. Biggest mistake I have ever made.

Being stuck in a place where I felt like I did not belong, studying something that made no sense for me whatsoever led me to believe I was stupid. I remember looking at my books and not understanding anything that was in there. I just couldn’t understand why was it so hard for me to understand accounting, finance, banking and all the other subjects I was studying…

“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” Einstein

It took me quite so time for me to understand that you you can’t fit a square peg into a round hole and that if you are an artist, you have to create art, and if you are an accountant, you have to do what accountants do.

I think Abraham Harold Maslow said it best: “A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself. What a man can be, he must be.”

5. The importance of being present and engaged in the now

I wish I would’ve learned in school how to be present and engaged in the present moment and how to appreciate life for what it is and also for what it not. To be thankful for whatever the present moment has to offer and if I say I want to be happy, to be happy here and now and not to wait for things to change and time to pass in order to feel those good feelings I say I want to feel.

Little children are very good at being present and engaged in the now but as they grow older and older, things change. Their minds start to wonder around, keeping them from being fully present in the now, keeping them from having as much fun as they used to when they were younger. They start to worry, to fear and to stress about the many things that might go wrong with them and the world around them… they stop enjoying life.

At the core, we all know how to be present, we all know ho to be happy,  how to enjoy life but for different reasons, we tend to forget and that’s why I think school would be a great place for us to start remembering and start living.

“Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of non-forgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence.” ~ Eckhart Tolle

6. Be a first rate version of yourself and not a second rate version of someone else

Since we are all unique individuals with unique gifts and talents, I think it would be great if they would start encouraging students in schools to embrace their authenticity, to teach them that its okay to be who they really are without the fear of being judged, labeled or criticized. Teachers shouldn’t ask their students to be normal but rather to be themselves.

We are all different and we can’t all play by the same rules. Our differences should be celebrated, appreciated and encouraged in schools, not judged, ridiculed and labeled harshly…

We need more authentic people in this world and schools would be a great place to learn about its value and importance.

“Being yourself is one of the hardest things because it’s scary. You always wonder whether you’ll be accepted for who you really are. I decided to call my record ‘Inside Out’ because that’s my motto about life. I don’t think you ever succeed at trying to be anyone else but who you truly are.” ~ Emmy Rossum

7. Never get your sense of worth from outside yourself

Why don’t they teach you in school not to get your sense of worth from outside yourself?  Why don’t they have a class called “Who you are is more than enough and you should never look outside yourself for approval and validation”?

When I was in school, comparison and competition were strongly encouraged by my teachers. As a result, we were all trying to get the best grades and we were all trying to better than the other students. We were all perceiving ourselves as being more or less valuable based on our grades.

Because I wanted to be the best in my class and because I wanted my teachers to like me, I was studying for the wrong reason. I wasn’t studying because I enjoyed studying or because I was passionate about the subjects I was studying but because I was after their approval.

It took me a long time until I realized that self worth comes from who you are internally and not from how other people treat you externally.

Never get your sense of worth from outside yourself. Don’t let other people tell you how much you’re worth, decide for yourself. It’s called self worth not others worth.

“Life is too short to waste any amount of time on wondering what other people think about you. In the first place, if they had better things going on in their lives, they wouldn’t have the time to sit around and talk about you. What’s important to me is not others’ opinions of me, but what’s important to me is my opinion of myself.” ~ C. JoyBell C.

Even though nobody taught me these things in school, I am grateful for the many books I have read and the many great teachers that came my way that taught me all of these things and many others. It’s because of them that I am the person I am today and I love me! Thank you books and thank you teachers!

Do you think you learn the basics to make it in life at school or on your own? What is your experience? What valuable lessons you wish you had learned in school and why? You can share your comments by joining the conversation in the comment section below.

About the Author

Luminita D. Saviuc is the renowned inspirational editor and creator of PurposeFairy.com. Please visit her excellent and enlightening site, where this article was originally published.